free as a bird

now here at the end of the days....

huh?...wala malabo na naman ang mga sinasabi ko...well ano ba ang update sakin ngayon...wala na kami ni francis...i broke up w/ him more than 2 weeks ago...why?..dahil may mga bagay na kelangang mangyari kahit pigilan mong mangyari...

i am attracted to somebody else...the same guy sa last blog ko...

how did the break up go?...mahirap na nakakagaan ng loob...magulo

i told him the truth...i am attracted to somebody else...pinilit kong pigilan..here's my most remembered line..."ikaw ang mahal ko pero iba ang palagi kong nakikita..."...then torrent of tears followed...not because i am hurt myself but for the fact that i am hurting the man who did nothing but love me...he never cheated..never lied..he gave me almost everything that he thought would make me happy..but it was not enough...i still had to let him go...

months before the break up...i was behaving badly...partying here and there...never ending drinking sessions w/ my peers...but here's what i really felt..gusto kong kumawala..mapag-isa...gawin ang mga bagay na gusto kong gawin na walang pipigil sakin...this thought had been nagging me for months...then i just did it...i told him i wanted to be free... then...it was over!

after the break up..may mga oras na hinahanap ko siya...nagsisimula pa lang ako mag-adjust...mahirap bumalik sa pagiging single kung mejo matagal kang may palaging kasama...nakakalungkot...pero kelangan na mangyari ang ganito...masasaktan lang siya sakin...he deserve someone better...

san ako papunta...panahon lang ang makapagsasabi...everything will just find it's place in the future...everything will be fine...but as of the moment....

---allow me to paint the whole town RED----